Friday, April 19, 2013

My Heart Is Breaking

I'm having a difficult time getting any work done today. Like everyone else, I have been absolutely riveted by what is going on in Boston right now.

I keep thinking about families that were probably woken up last night by the sounds of helicopters and sirens and gunshots. I am thinking of how Boston parents could have possible explained why their kids can't go to school or go outside today. What do you say to a six-year old when the swat team comes knocking at your door? How do you explain to your 10-year old that there are people who hate us just because of where we live? How do we protect our children and at the same time teach them, especially if we can't even begin to understand it?

I am not in Boston and I don't pretend to know what this must be like, but I can't help but take all of this personally. It is not happening to me, but I feel like it is. I am anxious and worried about my friends and family that live in the Boston area. I am angry that evil people have the power to make me feel this way. I am saddened that I probably won't ever be the same again. My kids are growing up in a country that doesn't feel as free as it did when I was a kid and there is nothing I can do about it.

No, I will not live in fear, but my heart is breaking that I have to be realistic about the changes I see in the world. I can't say it won't happen to me because I don't know that to be true anymore.

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